Ahoy there, ye scurvy beast! Avast with yer King’s English an’ join us, or ye’ll find yerself walkin’ the plank!
Today be a day fer to cheer ye up, no matter thee problems in yer life, an’ here we be celebratin’ ’til the mornin’, so just ye get over here an’ join in! It be the day of talkin’ like a pirate on all the seven seas, an’ ye be missin’ it!
For those of ye that tweets it be quite plain that today be the day, for ‘trending’ is the topic. But for those of ye who tweet not, it migh’ have passed ye by tha’ today is not fer speakin’ like a posh bloke, yeah?
Well I’m assured that ye’s all sensible folks but I know not if ye’ll understan’ the lingo, being not pirates yerselves but lubbers an’ bilge-rats. But did yer never wan’ to take to the seas an’ plunder an’ sail, ye’ll wan’ to be known’ how this all starrted, won’t yer?
So turn yer ships aroun’ an make for anotherr port o’ call, that being this ‘un:
Worry not, fer I’ll be back wit’ more regularrrr missives in the future, but fer today this be all yer gettin’. Scat, ye scurvy dogs!