“Gunshot” – A Poem

“Gunshot” – A Poem

This poem was written around a ‘deleted scene’ from my novel, an exercise in freewriting. It will make more sense to those who know the plot, but I hope you can all enjoy it.


i am alys hatton
the gun’s too close to me
i can hear it, and it’s deafening.


what deadly punctuation is this?
wrapped up. too wrapped up –
i have to see the –
the others. are they there?
who was shot?
not her, please not her

she wouldn’t shoot herself.
i whisper this under my breath
she wouldn’t, she never would,
she wouldn’t dare,
and if i say it enough times
then it has
to be true

angry. it’s been too long since i last
knew how
to feel anything except this burning
pain, since i last knew
how to think
before this cancer pressed down on my brain
and made me like this.
a child.

a blind child. i can’t see.
if before the world was a painting
then now it is a symphony
and i can’t hear the instrument i’m waiting for.
her voice. her voice is that melody
all by

i am desperate to stay awake
i will not close my eyes
not now
i promised
i have to know.
i will hold on to myself.

i am alys hatton.
i will remember.
i am alys hatton.
i am alys.
i am.



what deadly punctuation is this?

6 thoughts on ““Gunshot” – A Poem

    1. I had an excuse prepared in my head just then, like that this wasn’t actually what happened, just a deleted scene (the gun is never shot in the book), but … yeah, I have no excuse. I just like picking on Alys.
      And hurry up and read Destroying, I need feedback!

  1. Well you do call the trilogy Death and Fairies. *grin* Very powerful poen, though not necessarily my style (but I’m not much of a poet ot poety readers, so that explains a lot…)

    Anyway did you see the bit where I blogged that I mentioned Death and Fairies in my NaNo. I think Michael has got to be done translating it from the Latin alphabet to the symbolic one now in use. :}

    1. I did indeed, I believe I commented at the time? Can’t remember.
      I put this on Protag, and then realised I should’ve put it in the actual “Death and Fairies” collection (a bit like ‘Support’), but forgot. Oh well.

      1. So long as you tag it properly, it’s all good. Like Spook uses Asereon to gather her tilogy (and my lovely Danail in Denial song *giggles*) and I use Phoenixes of Vervell to gather my three books and realted material. Tags are good. But I suspect you know how to use those better than me, given all that search info you blogged on the other day. :}

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